Happy (Almost) Independence Day!

Any company producing a product called “Fired Up” should address the queen of all fired up holidays: the 4^th of July aka Independence Day!

Of course, we know it as the day that the “United States of America” finally signed the Declaration of Independence, proclaiming our separation from Great Britain. (I understand it was actually signed July 2, but needed to be edited for 2 days – another story.)

A mere 1,337 handwritten words including headings with 56 signatures announced the humanitarian values of this new country as well as a list of grievances that would not be repeated. It is to this day, one of the most powerful documents in our history and changed the course of not only this fledgling country, but the world.

When I talk to entrepreneurs, the #1 reason many have stepped into their lifestyle is a quest for “independence.”

It made me think that we should all have a personal Declaration of Independence. A brief document signed by ONE (you) that, similar to the Declaration, could have 3 parts:

1. What you stand for or believe in (the need to be creative, the right to create your own livelihood, the importance of helping others, the need to be self-expressive, etc….like a personal Purpose Statement.) It will be the values your business represents as well, I would think.
2. What mistakes you have seen others make that you will not make (What you will do to live the life you stand for)
3. What you are willing to do to live the life you have been designed to live which will set you free.

As soon as I started writing this, I just knew you’d want me to give you an example, so below is a quick, fairly imperfect template that I put together for myself just to give you some thoughts:

“I, Mary Lyn Miller, do declare I believe all beings are endowed with a Divine sense of Purpose and the ability to make their Purpose come to pass through the consistent pursuit and focus on passion and joy. Passion is light through the tunnel. I have come to know it is not always an easy journey, but the one which provides the most reward, fulfillment and financial well-being, and the one I must choose in order to live an authentic life without regret.

I will not:

• Work only for money.
• Ignore my innate gifts and talents
• Distrust my instincts
• Allow myself to be too afraid to do what I need to do to move forward
• Try to do it all myself
• Forget that prayer and meditation is almost always the answer to every major need or desire (forget myself and my ego.)

I will:

• Do something that gives me passion every day.
• Realize passion and purpose is not something “to find”– it is already in me and I simply need to give it space to express.
• Do my best to stay in the moment
• End every day with a profound sense of gratitude no matter what.

What about you? What would your personal Declaration of Independence look like? Take the time over this holiday weekend to give it some thought and make some notes.

We all have to invest time to be free. Happy 4^th!

Are We Having Fun Yet?

As I did my own visioning for this year and had to come to a startling realization: I haven’t been having as much fun as I could – and I am a FUN girl!

But like most many service provider/entrepreneurs, my priorities have been servicing my clients, attracting new clients, and learning more about expanding my business. I have carefully scheduled in my family, working out, personal development, and those things which will seemingly give me a higher quality of life.

Despite my best efforts, I admit something has been missing. As we look at the different areas of our lives, where is the slot that says “Giggling, spontaneity, joy with no goal, creative expression, silliness, new unexpected experiences, escape, and side-splitting laughter?” THAT’S what’s been missing!!

Here is what I have discovered has blocked me, and my commitment to changing it. (Wow! I’m saying this in public!) Maybe you can join me!

1) I have been thinking I need to schedule “fun” events for “when I have time.”

I expressed that I needed more fun to the attendees of my Vision Workshop last week, and, lo and behold, I received a couple of amazing fun invitations from people I absolutely love! But, at first I could feel myself resisting it. What!! I could feel myself fearing it would interfere with my work commitments; that it might (hear this) take too much time! But joy energizes so won’t it only enhance my work time? If I wait until I have time – well, I won’t have much time. New Commitment: I can schedule work around my opportunities for fun and joy.

2) I think I need to be an adult; sometimes I need to act like a child

Being an adult can be stressful. Children – icons of play and fun – do almost everything in the moment. When they tire of an activity, they stop and go to something new. But, for me, the adult, the suggestion of an unexpected invitation to lunch, a surprise mid-day walk on the beach, or an unplanned stop at the park strikes a chord of overwhelm, rather than the source of re-vitalizing one’s life. I think: “Don’t these people know I have a schedule? I can’t just drop everything!” But, I have been changing this in the past 6 months, and am now finding these surprise adventures some of my most enjoyable times. No one has had a crisis because I went on a walk or shopped for art, but I returned a more energized, passionate entrepreneur.

3) Not everything achieves a goal; pointless activity is good.

As a vision and goals coach, I tend to be activity focused, so I am better at “fun” if it comes with meeting a goal. The doctor says to relax because it’s good for my heart; I attend a fun event where I can also network; and so forth. But, here’s the truth. My adorable husband is the most grounded person in the Universe, and we experience the most laughter and silliness going to Costco or Home Depot. We have always been a somewhat Seinfeld-like couple where our best times are doing absolutely nothing. Yes, we do travel and do some exotic things, but we don't need to. In fact, we seem to gravitate toward large wholesale stores for our best times – we don’t usually buy much – but the walking around the store watching the people and playing with the shopping cart has brought us hours of amusement. We love Palm Desert – and their Wal-Mart! I have learned that most of what I experience as joyful is in the moment, and often entirely pointless….and incredibly rewarding.

My conclusions are that I need to be more spontaneous, say yes more, and be in the flow more. The resulting passion, energy and varied experiences will bond me to the people around me, and actually cause me to be a more effective service provider and business woman.

Well, now that I have confessed, what about you? I’d love to hear about some of your thoughts about fun in your life and what kind of role it plays. I have no workshop on it and no offer here – just my personal thoughts to start of the New Year!!

Love to hear yours.

7 Benefits of Finding your Purpose

We often talk about finding your purpose as a personal growth exercise or a spiritual quest which may feel somewhat removed from our daily life. While purpose certainly can be spiritual and growth oriented, a strong sense of purpose has infinitely more practical applications which promotes well being in all areas of your life.

As a teacher of life purpose and coach helping clienys create purposeful, passionate careers and businesses, I have seen the remarkable transformation when one find their purpose.

Here are just a few benefits to connecting with your purpose:

1) Self-Esteem
When you truly understand our purpose more fully, you more fully realize what you have to offer. You realize your value, and not only feel better about yourself, but are more equipped to communicate our value to others whether it is in a job interview, self-promotion or marketing a business.

2) Belonging
Purpose helps us to find our place. Once we realize what we are here to do, our sense of competition and insecurity is lessened. We have something to do that is our own. We are unique. It allows us to be more connected to ourselves and to others.


3) Clarity/Direction
Opportunities and information abound in today’s world. Without a clear sense of how and why you operate the way you do, you really can’t really grasp a solid direction. Direction does not come out of learned skills, but more out of passion, joy, a sense of calling and love. The more you know about what this means for you, the more direction you will experience.


4) Passion
Passion and purpose are inextricably linked. Purpose is defined by your passions. It’s the energy and fuel that allows you to fully express your purpose. The outcroppings of passion are laughter and fun which, interestingly, are powerfully transformational. We don’t do it nearly enough, and yet laughter and fun alone can change our lives.

5) Energy
Living with passion and purpose results in a more energetic, fired up way of life. (In case you wondered where my name came from :) Energy is the natural signal of purpose. An energy spike in your life for any reason is a positive indicator that you are headed in the right direction and living in alignment with your purpose.

6) Opportunity/Money
Purpose is a magnet for opportunity and fulfillment. Purpose and its related passion and energy become a powerful attracting force for anything on which it is focused. Despite what we've been taught, hard work is the WORST solution. Seek inspiration and flow. Flow is the key to successful, effortless living and requires letting go, relaxing and allowing. We talk about cash FLOW. Flow rarely happens if you are not grounded in a sense of purpose. We find that people who are purpose/passion powered attract everything they need, as they need it.

7) Fulfillment & Spiritual Connection
Focused purpose and expressed passion is a powerful formula for happiness and fulfillment…which is the purpose for all of our lives. The sense that we are a part of a much larger universe and that all things are orchestrated in our higher good offers a sense of trust, faith and staibility so terribly needed in tough times.

And, there is so much more!

I was thrilled to find out recently that the Beach Cities Health District designated my "Discovering Your Life's Purpose" class one of their "Live Well" classes and the featured class for Emotional Well Being.

If you would like the CD or MP3 of one of my past Life Purpose classes, go to www.firedupforsuccess.com/store

How to Control Overwhelm

“Overwhelm” seems to be more the norm than the unusual today. We’ve grown used to being “overwhelmed” as a way of life, but did you know it can rob you of your motivation, your health, your relationships, your financial stability and your overall well being?

When we are facing a career change or major life transition or thinking about what we’re going to do next, we can feel overwhelmed even when we are doing nothing. The thoughts in our head just take up so much space!

But, you CAN do something about it. It’s not HAPPENING to you. It is the result of certain behaviors and mindsets, and I’m going to talk about some of them over the next few weeks so that you can join me in DECIDING that this is no longer a useful coping mechanism.

Are you ready to do something about it? I am. You CAN change this destructive habit, and in the next weeks we’re going to tackle this together.

So let’s start by discussing the concept of “time.”

Yep, when we’re overwhelmed, we feel a constriction of time. Time is like having a limited amount of space in a drawer, and an infinite amount of things to put it in it. Everyday people around us are constantly making up new things for us to put in our 24 hour drawer. The list is growing and expanding as we speak. (Well, I’m writing.) Yet, there is still only the same amount of space in that drawer.

In fact, our language is often about feeling “jammed up,” “tight,” and, well, “overwhelmed,” because our drawer is overly full.

It’s important to note that mental energy has the power to really fill up the drawer! There’s nothing like a solid negative thought to get your drawer filled to the brim.

The drawer is the same for everyone, by the way. I have the same 24 hours in a day that you do. But, those who are centered, focused, satisfied and fulfilled make different choices than some of us who are rushed and overwhelmed all the time. They choose wisely what they put in their "drawer," and what they leave out of it. And, they make no attempt to do it ALL. They are content with choosing less in their drawer – and enjoying it more.

According to Jeffrey Davidson, a time "attitude" consultant, "the mega-realities of life in America are that there are too many people, too much information and limitless choices. The one thing that isn’t limitless is time - there is only so much a person can accomplish in a day. Those ever growing realities make learning to ’manage’ your time only a short term solution," says Davidson.

So, you can see, that tomorrow, next week, next month next year, the demands on your time are going to be greater. You no sooner get a handle on your current situation then 6 …or 20…. new things show up, and your time management plan is a shambles.

Now let’s go back to the drawer. The quality of your life is determined by what you choose to put in your drawer …and what you leave out every day.

What qualifies as a “choice?” You have made a choice when you say “Yes, I’ll do that.” Or “yes, I’m going to buy into that negative idea.”

So, how do you determine what goes in and what gets left out?

Passion goes in. Dreams, visions, fun, laughter and creativity go in. Anything that captures your imagination and makes your spirit soar goes in. Time with family, Disneyland, nature and self-renewal go in the drawer.

For some amazing reason, passion, joy, balance and play actually increases space in your drawer. That energy creates more energy.
It also keeps the negative thinking quiet as well.

But most of us fill up our 24 Hour Drawer with less than meaningful activity, stressful work, and bland relationships in hopes that somehow, someday there will be "extra" time to pursue something we care more about. It doesn’t work. It only makes you feel more hopeless and helpless…which starts another round of space filling negative thinking.

So, make a note to start to remove energy draining activity, meaningless tasks and anything that doesn’t inspire you…OUT of the drawer. If you are wondering how to determine that, sentences that begin with “I have to, ought to and should” tell you what needs to go out.

These are all things that you are resisting and don’t make you feel good, and will trigger negative thinking which triggers even more overwhelm.

But you may be thinking, “What will I do about my responsibilities?”

In my next article I will talk about exactly that.

But, right now, I suggest you begin to become aware of your drawer. What are you putting in your drawer and what could you leave out?

This is the beginning of releasing overwhelm.